It's My Birthday!!!

Ok, it WAS my birthday on 3/12. I have been busy with work and birthday preparation and getting my dog taken care of. Pretty much, LIFE! I have also agreed to be a bridesmaid in ANOTHER wedding and am apparently the fit model/sounding board for the bride. I believe that brings my grand total to 15. Yes, I have been a member of the bridal party at least 15 times (including my mother's remarriage). I'm like the Black 27 dresses. I even did 2 weddings in one month in 2008! Anywhoo, back to the blog. I've been absent trying to get life under control, but I missed my blog!

Natural Love @ the Grammys!!

F-R-E-E

I just found out that Ulta will be providing free blowouts on February 16th from 3-8p and on February 17th from 1-4p. They are providing the free service as part of their product launch of PHYTO's new Phytolisse Perfect Smoothing Collection. Ulta is offering complimentary blowouts at all their stores, nationwide (Google Ulta for locations-there are two locations in Southeastern Virginia, one in Newport News and one in Virginia Beach). I have reviewed Phyto's deep conditioners in the past (check the review section) and like the products.

In addition to a free blowout, you'll also receive a travel-sized set of the bestselling Phytodefrisant and Phytolisse Serum with the purchase of two PHYTO products.


I just made my appointment (yes, you can make an appointment for this FREE service) I'll be going for a blowout in preparation for a self-trim. I will probably bring my own co-washing conditioner and will definitely pre-poo in preparation and bring my own detangling brush.

Enjoy!

Houston (or wherever you live), we're having a problem!

Natural Hair vs. Relaxed/Weaved Hair

Recently, there has been a wave of YouTube posts, articles, and blog posts regarding the perceived war between natural hair and relaxed hair or otherwise altered hair. I agree that naturals and permies do sometimes wage war against each other, but more often than not it comes down to accepting your hair and yourself. I had a relaxer for 20 yrs before transitioning because I felt it was a better choice for ME. A very good friend was natural for 5 yrs before relaxing her hair due to frustration wit...h her lack of curl or kink ( her hair is a mix of her dad's soft wave and her mom's fine and kinky hair). She continues to go back and forth over her decision and often seems defensive regarding her choice. She tells me that she's frustrated that the natural revolution seems limited to those with thicker, kinkier hair like mine and essentially feels like her Blackness is questioned. When I point out that kinkier hair has historically been reviled, and that is why it's such a big deal that it's more accepted, she seems more agitated regarding her choice to relax and seems to feel that I'm judging her. I say, make peace with the hair that grows out of your head and change your hairstyle if you wish (relaxer, weave, extensions, etc.), but don't continue to complain about your hair or others'. No hair style or method is for everyone, but I refute the myth that natural hair takes more time and energy because you can make your hair as simple or as complicated as you choose, regardless of texture. I love my permies and my naturals equally, but I don't tolerate negative comments about my hair, particularly from anyone whose hair is damaged and scraggly, relaxed or not.

Happy New Year!! Resolutions or Regrets?

Happy New Year, baby!

Every New Year we all make resolutions and most of us break our resolutions within a month, according to scientists who study that sort of thing. This year, I'm focusing on 3 managable resolutions:  flossing daily, getting more exercise, and being on time.  So far, I'm flossing about every other day and I've joined a local adult basketball league (2 games each week), so those are going pretty well.  That last one is gonna be a struggle, but I'm gonna keep trying!  Anyways, we all make these resolutions for our health and our daily lives, but what about our hair?  I've decided to make 3 hair resolutions this year as well:

1. Try more styles.  In my first year of natural hair, I think I did pretty well in finding hairstyles that suited my length, personality, and profession.  I did the basic fro, fro w/headband, twists, twists pinned up, twistouts, roll and tuck, and even some spontaneous Bantu knots (when my twists looked a little crazy).  This year I wanna try at least 5 more new styles.  At least one of my friends is getting married this year, so that'll be a good opportunity to try at least one new fancy style!
2.  Replace my sulfate-free, silicone-filled leave-in w/ a silicone AND sulfate-free one.  It's tough to find one that doesn't have either silicones or sulfates, AND has a pleasant smell, but a friend recommended Giovanni's Smooth As Silk Deeper Moisture conditioner.  I plan to test it out next time I wash my hair, but before I use up what I have (Herbal Essences Dangerously Straight and Aussie Moist).  
3. Attempt the original Tightly Curly method on longer hair.  I tried it when my hair was too short for a puff and it didn't turn out great.  I'd like to try it again now that my hair has pretty much doubled in length.  Hopefully it works out better.  Until then, I'll stick to my modified version (I twist my hair, rather than define my curls).

Hair Rules

In every natural's life, there comes a time when someone will be so overcome by the beauty and wonder that is your hair that they will feel compelled to TOUCH IT!!  Those who have recently BC'd may say "no big deal", but those of us with some length and who wear our hair in a variety of styles (twists, coils, updos, or whatever) may shrink back in fear.  For the time when you see people getting the itch to scratch your head, I've composed some suggestions:

1. Be clear and explicit in explaining how your hair can be handled by those closest to you.  For some reason, a lot of people think that loose natural hair requires no styling and therefore is subject to random probing.  
2. Explain to your significant other that your hair may come out of its style if fondled roughly.  You know what I mean!
3.  Try to refrain from utilizing martial arts in protecting your coif.  This may be especially difficult for the aggressive natural.
4. Develop a good side eye. When someone attempts to touch your hair, and you wish they'd keep their hands to themselves, turn to face them, look them squarely in the eye and then SIDE EYE the hell out of them!
5. Decide under which conditions you will allow people to touch your hair.  For me, I will let another natural touch my hair pretty much all day long; however, random folks get the case-by-case screening because some people get nap-happy.  
6. Explain to your significant other AGAIN how to handle your hair w/TLC if s/he plans to handle you w/TLC.  You may need diagrams.  I pretty much allow my boo free reign unless my hair is up and tucked away, which he knows took me some doing.  He knows that it's play time if my hair is in twists, a fro, or a puff, as long as he does not leave "holes" in my hair.
7. When all else fails, channel Ms. Sophia (from the play The Color Purple, not the movie The Color Purple) and state in a strong, clear voice "Helllllllllllllllllll, NO!"

Stay happy, stay nappy!